what a fucking day to go through.

i am,
an ugly truth,
and you would run,
miles away,
before i could shred a
single tear.

there is time,
all i want just
to sleep,
with my insecurity,
and let it eats me.
because

i am tired of fighting.

mencari jawapan.
pada soalan yang tak wujud.

nyatanya
hati aku tak bisa
bedakan obsesi dan cinta
atau benar,
aku kedua-duanya
cinta dan obsesi

sudah berpurnama
jalan tidur tak sehaluan masa
seperti aku mundur ke belakang
masih belum punya tapak
ke depan
atau benarnya,
ia obsesi tak punya jawapan

buat aku dongak
ke langit
dengan jiwa yang sama
saat semua burung
telah terbang
ke benua lain

no.
time is not a cure.

hi dad.
i'll be better.
i'll be that young boy you told me.
i'm practising.
beating myself to be one.
it was too late that time,
i'm sorry, but i'll be better.
i hate you dad.
i'm sorry.
i'm sorry.

that i was too late.
that i was young.

that i ignored.

hi dad.
i miss you.

hi mom.
i'll see you real soon.

hi sis.
be happy.

hi bro.
be good.

hi sis.
i love you.

hi nephews.
i hate you all.

hi nieces.
miss me?