those who work with mice are so lucky.
human have too many bullshits to deal with.

rimas.

am i lying to myself?

everyone, at one point, will eventually leave. don't you think?
we have bigger commitments await, more important person to attend to, raising up new family, looking for new adventure, whatever it is, we leave.

we leave the life that we said the best time of all, we leave the saddest part of us that we never thought will ever end, we leave, we move on.

i think that's what life is just all about. we don't walk backward to ones that already became memories, one that once upon a time , we swore that we would live it forever, and i don't know why i feel sad;

that memories aren't really much real anymore,
that they will be forgotten for most of the time.

i can't write a single thing about you after knowing you.
it amazes me how much i used to write about you then.

something is just really confusing.

thinking about quitting my job.

yeah. it's just a vivid dream.
i wouldn't be dare enough to quit.

bro, got lots of things to pay.

who give you right to judge somebody's life?

coming back to work after three days of break really kills me.
i can't handle things anymore. too many and so little help.
keep telling myself i can do this. i can. what a lie.

                                and being me..i fall in love again, as i don't know how not to,
                                                                  

  Malacca, 9 October 2016

the first real shot, early morning, of something that is mine.

i like this one actually. obviously, i wasn't the one who took this. 

the rest of the pictures are beautiful as much as how i felt about the day. 

I'm struggling and juggling with my life, have been few months that I feel like I'm living in a tank that will be exploded soon and I'm going to sink in the water and die tragically. I know, I know, everyone does feel the same, but I can't take this anymore. I really don't know where to take my life to, and I, not sure anymore what I'm doing. Everything, every single of them is out of place, and I have no control over what happens in my life, I can't take over my feelings, I can't control the sadness that , somehow, always find its way to creep in and settle itself comfortably in my head. This is hard, and according to few articles I've been reading, I somehow, somewhere, in one way or another, have managed to make contact with depression.

I need to get out from this.

I need to save myself.